We’ve put together the most common and stupid excuses for cheating. Curl your fingers if you’ve heard one.
“It was laid by nature”
Drawing parallels between the human and animal world has become a universal justification for male infidelity. In males, evolutionarily laid down a constant search for ways to preserve and reproduce the most successful traits of their species. The easiest option in this fight is to transfer genes to as many females as possible.
But evolutionary theory is outdated, and secondly, if you follow it, then you need not just have sex, but leave offspring after each contact.
Women’s infidelity is usually spoken of from the standpoint of feelings. Women cheat when they get bored with a man, when he cannot cover her needs or is not able to give enough love and attention.
The truth is that both men and women change their heads when making the appropriate decision. But the reasons and goals of betrayal can really be radically different.
“They change everything anyway”
Mothers all over the world will now exclaim: “And if everyone jumps off the roof, will you jump too?” For people who justify infidelity by belonging to a community, betrayal is a kind of initiation rite.
A very common scenario when a man’s friends joke that in their company he alone did not cheat on his partner.
Such an excuse is an attempt to shift the responsibility off your shoulders. In our society focused on the preservation of family values, treason is condemned.
The traitor’s logic is this: if you are the only unfaithful person in the whole world, all judgmental glances will be directed at you. And if they change everything, it turns out that condemning gazes are scattered in the crowd, and everything does not look so scary.
And yes, not everyone changes, just for reference.
“Sex on the side strengthens the relationship”
We’re talking about the very leftist who strengthens marriage. Then, according to the logic of this justification, after the betrayal, the situation should develop as follows.
The cheater, under the onslaught of guilt, will become more attentive, more caring, will begin to appreciate the partner, will return home with his eyes open to the world. The side that was changed may remain in the dark, then there is a great chance that she will be delighted with the renewed courtship.
Or, if the deceived side realizes the betrayal on the part of the partner, this will become an incentive for her to be better – to take care of herself, to pay more attention to her soul mate.
Psychologists say that if there are problems in a relationship, cheating, having children, or introducing other variables will not fix them. The key to getting rid of problems is having honest conversations and creating fertile ground in the form of trust, support, shared fondness and, yes, honesty.
“Relationships are love, and sex on the side is the needs of the body.”
“It was just sex, that person means nothing to me, and I love you.” Such an attempt to justify itself is pure manipulation. The same manipulation can be called excuses like “I still return to you” or “cheating helped me understand that there is no one better than you.
It is assumed that this should flatter the partner, because among all the others they chose him, he is the best, he is beloved.
By the way, infidelity, if we consider it to be sex or relationships on the side, in itself is not proof of dislike. A person who has cheated on his partner may well clearly separate love and sex or love for several people at the same time.
Unfortunately, it does not cancel the fact of treason.